Fragile
line separates teachers, students
Monday, May 09, 2005 • By LINDA
LISANTI • The Express-Times
The equation for classroom relations is
simple, education professionals say.
Teacher plus student equals no personal
relationship.
Lately, though, at least two local
teachers have made headlines for their mistaken math in that
area, leading some educators in the greater Lehigh Valley to
question whether the fine line between appropriate and
inappropriate behavior has faded.
Phillipsburg High School instructor
George Chilmonik said teachers walk that line every day and
although they may not realize it, crossing it can be as
simple as telling a student they look nice.
Often, it's the younger male teachers who
have the hardest time differentiating, he said. In some high
school classrooms, the age difference between the student
and teacher is just four years.
"They make the transition from being a
student to being a professional in a very short time,"
Chilmonik said. "They go from a college campus where every
student is eligible to date to a high school where no
student is."
High school girls, he added, can be very
admiring of their male teachers and might encourage a
friendlier relationship.
"They think it's cool to get special
attention from their teachers," Chilmonik said.
But for the teacher, among peers, "you
are looked upon as a lesser being," he explained.
Easton Area High School teacher Charlie
Brill said for some instructors right out of college,
there's a temptation to view their students as
peers.
When that happens, he said, the teacher
ends up being more like a friend. When that relationship
breaks down, the teacher loses control of the students that
he or she is entrusted to educate.
"They don't want to listen to you because
you're just a friend," Brill said. "Most teachers find out
early that there's a way to be firm but fair and that you're
not their friend."
Warren Hills Regional School District
Superintendent Peter Merluzzi said teachers can be cordial,
but the issue remains that "you're really not their
friends."
Teachers want to like the kids. They want
the kids to like them in return so they relax their guards,
he said. When things happen, though, Merluzzi said the time
comes to stop and assess the situation.
"You have to stand back and say 'wait,
this is going where it shouldn't go,' " he added.
Last month, two former Warren Hills
Regional High School teachers -- John Kurdilla, 26, and John
Lesher, 28, --were accused of giving alcohol to underage
students for the 2004 prom.
Lesher is also charged with sending
sexually explicit text messages to a student's cell
phone.
Because of these incidents, the school
district next year will make a stronger attempt to stress to
teachers where the fine line lies, Merluzzi said.
He said they can no longer assume that
the staff knows.
The topic is always touched upon during
new teacher orientation. But Merluzzi said this year's plan
is to spend time understanding exactly what is and isn't
acceptable.
"Sometimes, you have to get down to the
nitty-gritty," he said.
Chilmonik, who also serves as president
of Phillipsburg's teachers union, said he makes it very
clear during new teacher training that any personal
relationship outside the boundaries of education is not only
unethical, but illegal.
"Regardless of what the student looks
like, they are the student and you are the professional.
There's no fuzzy line here. I don't know how more blunt you
can be," he said.
To eliminate any confusion, Chilmonik
said all schools should require their teachers and students
to attend workshops on the subject with the district's
attorney.
Easton does for its teachers, said Brill,
also the union president.
During the session, they are reminded of
the importance of keeping themselves away from questionable
situations.
One way they're told to do so is to
ensure that anytime they're with a student, it's around
others.
Brill said it's also beneficial for
colleges and universities to educate the future teachers
they're molding more extensively on the fine
line.
"There's no question that you have an
occasional kid that has a crush on a teacher, and how do you
handle that?" he added.
Sandra Fluck, chairwoman of Moravian
College's education department, said professors there might
not talk specifically about inappropriate student-teacher
relations, but do discuss professionalism.
The lesson they try to
instill?
That there's a significant difference
between being a friend and behaving in a friendly
manner.
"Regardless of age, you always need to
know you're the teacher," Fluck said. "You're not a student.
You're not a colleague of a student. You're the adult. There
is no choice here. There is just no choice."
Reporter Linda Lisanti can be reached at 610-258-7171 or
by e-mail at llisanti@express-times.com.
© 2005 The Express-Times. Used with
permission.
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